Home Comedy Garrison Keillor: Just Passing Through…again.

Garrison Keillor: Just Passing Through…again.

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Famed author and radio personality, Garrison Keillor returns to Crystal Lake’s Raue Center For The Arts, September 24 @ 8p. His last visit in 2014 was a sellout smash but for one small issue…a delayed curtain time due to a “quick” dash to Starbucks.

“And Go, Mr. Keillor.  Mr. Keillor? Garrison?!

“Garrison has left the building. He’s at Starbucks.”

“What do you mean he’s at Starbucks? He’s supposed to go on now!”

“Well, you know.  He likes people.  He’s chatting people up.”

We at Raue Center adore Mr. Keillor and his words. Here are some of our favorites. –Richard Kuranda, executive director Raue Center For the Arts

Garrison Keillor on…

GRATITUDE
“Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough. Thank you for the rain. And for the chance to wake up in three hours and go fishing: I thank you for that now, because I won’t feel so thankful then.”

HISTORY
“It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn’t hear the barbarians coming.”

GUN CONTROL
“A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table – There’s nothing wrong with them, but it’s hard to stop thinking about it.”

EVOLUTION
“Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.”

CHILDHOOD
“The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.”

HUMOR
“The funniest line in English is ‘Get it?’ When you say that, everyone chortles.”

WRITING
“I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was a boy, though it seemed an unlikely outcome since I showed no real talent. But I persevered and eventually found my own row to hoe. Ignorance of other writers’ work keeps me from discouragement and I am less well-read than the average bus driver.”

BOOKS
“One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don’t read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.”

BEAUTY
“Beauty isn’t worth thinking about; what’s important is your mind. You don’t want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head.”

SEX
“Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn.”

ART
“Your life is a work of art, and in the end, the underlying theme of great art is bravery and hope and love.”

POLITICS
“When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.”